Wednesday, February 15, 2012

Forever a Phat Girl

"I am pulling for you to "trap" that phat girl on the inside and let the "skinny bitch" out". - anonymous Face Book friend message

I know that the above comment was made with love and support despite this person disagreeing with my decision to have surgery.  I appreciate it for what it is, it's meant to be supportive and encouraging and I take it as such.  I love this person immensely and I know it’s reciprocated.

I know not everyone will agree with my choice, not everyone will offer support.  You know what, that's fine because I don't need your approval or your acceptance.  The choice is mine and mine alone.   

Sorry if that sounds rude as it's not my intention to be so.  My motivation to have surgery is not rooted in my desire to be a "skinny bitch".  I want to be healthy, I want to live, I want to run and I want to enjoy whatever time on this Earth that is given to me.  

 I don’t have the expectation that I’ll be “skinny”, “thin” or even average weight.  Am I stoked by the idea that I could potentially lose 100% of my excess body weight?  Of course, but more importantly, my diabetes will probably be cured, my aching knees and back will feel so much better.  My overworked heart will pump stronger and more efficiently.  In short, I will have my body back and a relatively healthy one at that.

I will ALWAYS be a “Phat Girl”.   Being a Phat Girl is not the state of your body, it’s in your soul.  Only a true Phat Girl will understand that.

12 days to surgery. Time to get my proverbial shit together and get right.

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